There is more than just black and white. Also, there is more then love and hate. All what i do in my life is somewhere in between. I guess a man can be happy to experience at least one of the ends on the story. It doesn’t always have to be love that gives as a reason to live. it doesn’t have to be child or family or better future or revenge that moves us forward on the life line-.
The hardest thing for me is to find that one point in me, that is not looking for any end, that doesn’ t make a border for anything. I am not trying to be. Cause I am.
The life will happen anyway. With or without me. I will move forward no matter what and that i can’t change. Even when i’m stuck, i’m moving. Only backwards.
Nothing ever stops. Love don’t stop. Sex doesn’ t end.
After i have walked all the streets alone and made all the suppers for my billion imaginary friends, i stumble down again and lay down on a cold ground. Million billion miles from where you are, i find my self in the middle of a pale green field. like a new born child i’m waiting to be pushed out of this watery melancholia and held in a sweet warm arms of someone i will love for all my life.
Kiss me. Hug me. Have me. Let me. Talk. I don’t care what about. Just talk with/to me. Tell me about the newest cars. Tell me about gardens with no flowers, tell me about people who have died. Tell me about all the things that moves your heart. I will listen. I’ll keep silence. I’ll keep all your silence to myself. I will care.
Our distance is only ours. No one can take it away from us, even by bringing both of us together again.
There are ghosts running through my head. They come from past and they are going to destroy my future. They are cyborgs that have lost their light swords, so now they’re taking my light away. They touch me when I’m asleep. Bastards..
I hear them crying at night. They are tight up in their dreams. Who said that robots don’t have a heart? I do!
At the end it IS all about you. – they say, looking at me with pierced eyes. I see flowers growing in their heads and birds singing through their systems. I think that’s what robots paradise like..
It’s the wall, behind witch you are making love so sensually. I try to remember the time when I felt that my world fits just inside my arms. You can bend your elbows around it, squeeze it, kiss it, hold it, make love to it, feed it, take care of it, read stories to it, bake eggs together with it, scream at it, make up with it, shop with it, go to church with it, dance and celebrate, fall asleep with it, write letters to it, visit your parents with it, introduse your friends with it, squeeze it, kiss it, hold it…
I have this memory burned to my hard drive… You”re next to me. Sleeping beauty, just rising up like a blossom from your dreams. or my dreams – it IS hard to recall.
Gently as hell you are tossing around my dreams and my beliefs, my fights and my faiths. . As if anything of it would be real. As if i needed it, as if i begged for it, as if my imagination could bring me back to how it was built in my head at age 6..
None of it matters really.
Dreams are for fags.
Still…
I wake up every morning hoping to see you in my bed.
I don’t know if you know my friend Darta, but this is going to be a blog about her.
We are going to travel to Milan and Porto together at the beginning on February (it’s hers and mine Nameday time). I’m really exited about that. We are just having pretty dresses and cameras in our bags and everyday vine bottles in our hands. That’s all we’re gonna do for excited 2 weeks – girly talks, vines, taking photos and laughing and screaming in little old city streets.
So, enaugh about that. Darta is making a photo-book. Since she says i’m her inspiration at some point, she wanted to take pictures of me. And here they are – all Liva in person. As seven Snow white’s dwarts.
I have to wonder again. – How does it come, that all, I mean ALL my girls are so fabulous??? Where do I get them? How do they find me? I don’t really care, I just know, that they are all so very overloaded with greatness! I’m in love with my girls.
Ok, so know you have a little chance to meet them a bit closer! Welcome to my sexy world of my passion for life!!!
p.s. Yesterday some nice guys from Amsterdam asked me where do i get my inspiration for my works. It’ s nothing more but sex, coffee and girls!
Me:. There is nothing really what to say. “Point” would be the most exact thing that could describe me. I get older every day. I get sadder every minute. I do believe in love. In other people. I just don’t think that there is a part in It for me. ... Continue reading »
